How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize