high people should be assigned attendants
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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