Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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