Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize