shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
