At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize