we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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