we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
