You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
