Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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