If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i want to swaddle you in tequila
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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