At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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