2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize