So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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