idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize