I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
