Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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