69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
