I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
