loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
