Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
