I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
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