the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize