And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize