It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
