Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
