Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Im part way to drunk.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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