Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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