Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
