Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
