love makes seman taste better
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize