He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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