the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
