she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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