Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
