I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize