And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
