Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
