I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
