Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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