I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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