He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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