return my video game
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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