I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
