and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
