we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
