Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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