Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
