OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
