Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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